The Gathering

Hey Friends,

As many of you may already know, we have seen some improvements with my health over the last couple of months. I'm SO thankful for that. Many of my symptoms have started to decrease, and I often have more strength and energy now than I did in the recent past - although my body still does tend get tired very quickly. We are still working through some concerns, but I'm hopeful that things will continue to improve from here. 

It's been a difficult year, but as I mentioned in a recent Facebook post, I'm so thankful for the opportunities this time of rest has given me to grow in my faith, trust in God's plans and timing, become more confident in who I am, spend time with family, and enjoy the simple things in life.

As I've begun to feel better, God has really laid it on my heart to look for a new church home. I've been following along with Summit RDU's "Year of the Bible" series online, which I've loved and will continue to do, but I've really missed connecting and growing with a church community. I've also missed worshiping through music in a church setting, as that is one of my favorite ways of praising God. 

I was driving in Newton with my mom about a month back. As we were sitting in traffic on Main Street, I looked to my right and saw a sign that said, "Welcome Home." This immediately made me think of Hillsong, as those two words were the first thing I saw when I walked into Hillsong Cape Town on Good Friday during Semester at Sea a little more than three years ago. 

Hillsong Cape Town, 2013

Scrolling through Facebook on the way home - my mom was driving, don't worry - I saw a post at the top of my feed where a friend mentioned a new church she had gone to and loved earlier that day. Which church? You guessed it: The Gathering. In that moment, I had such a strong and exciting feeling that God was leading me to this church.  

I didn't go for the next two weeks. First it was Father's Day, and then the following week the two friends I wanted to go with were out of town. They were both with their families for the 4th of July the week after that, but something in me was telling me to go anyway. 

Being the introvert that I am, the idea of going to a new church completely on my own was a bit overwhelming. The same applies to going to any new place where there will be a lot of unfamiliar people. My mind generally likes to come up with a nice long list of things that could go wrong in a situation like this: 

• "What if I start to feel sick in the middle of the service? I won't have anyone there who will know how to help."

• "I can't eat bread right now. What will I do if they have communion?"

• "What if no one talks to me?"

• "What if people judge me for showing up alone?"

• "Sometimes I'm an awkward person. What if I say something dumb and make a fool of myself?"

• "What if I can't find a place to park?"

Yes, I'm serious. Those are all thoughts I had at some point during the couple of days leading up to that Sunday - so many "what ifs." 

Allowing my own doubts and insecurities to keep me from something I feel God has called or led me to is one thing I  struggle with. Sometimes I really can just get in my own way. When I feel myself begin to worry or overthink, I've found it helps to talk to God about it and remind myself that it's not about me, but about Him and His glory.

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me,  and lead me in the way everlasting. - Psalm 139:23-24 

If he has called me to something, I can trust there's a reason and a purpose for that. That should be my focus, and I should rest freely and peacefully in Him. 

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. - Psalm 32:8

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. - Exodus 14:14

After spending some time with God, I began to recognize how silly and selfish it was that I was even considering letting any of those little "worries" keep me from stepping out and trusting Him. I had been so worked up and caught in my own head that I lost sight of my reasons for going in the first place. I had begun to second guess not only myself, but also God. 

When I began to pray about, laugh about and shake off those negative thoughts, my excitement about finding a church and my desire to follow God's lead started to override all of those fears and insecurities.  

I decided to go for it. I was greeted with smiles, handshakes and words of welcome the moment I walked in the door. The atmosphere was alive, vibrant and joyful. As soon the worship team started to sing, my heart became full with God's presence. The pastor, Brandon, was engaging and very relatable. He spoke with passion, honesty and humor, which is a style of preaching I really connect with. I introduced myself to him at the end of the service. (I'm glad I didn't give myself time to overthink that one. Haha.) I left that morning knowing that this was a special place.

The following Sunday (July 10), Brandon's message reminded me a lot of the message Phil Dooley spoke at Hillsong the morning I was saved. I found a lot of peace and comfort in that, and it served as further confirmation for me that this is where God wants me to be. 

I'm so thankful that I decided to listen to God's voice instead of the voices of my fears and doubts. I can't wait to start meeting more people, getting involved and seeking the ways that I can help to build God's kingdom through this church. 

If you struggle with overthinking like I do, I encourage you to let God take control. Constant worrying does nothing but drive our hearts and spirits into a state of fear and anxiety. Take a deep breath. Remember who God is and what He has done for you. Thank Him for His love and grace. Seek His guidance. Listen to His prompting. Trust in His plans. Rest in His Promises. 

Have a wonderful rest of your week, everyone!

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” - Deuteronomy 31:6